I'll just echo JRs comments that you appear to have handled it extremely well CA. I've been through similar w/ my WW and haven't handled it remotely as well as you did. I was also shocked by just how much spew came out of her and how much she seemed to enjoy taking shots at me during it. There were times that I looked at her and I'd swear she had a smile on her face. Frightening.
That's great that you've got a consultation w/ a L. I agree w/ AP (as he's the one who pushed me to setup my own) that you need to know your options. Be prepared for your WW to try to misinform you around custody/financial support if she thinks you haven't consulted an L.
Some vets can give better feedback, but I'd offer you stay the course here. Laying some good groundwork for the future. just make sure that whatever you say, you are able/willing to back up.
Thanks, lt!
I feel like I certainly made some mistakes, but overall am very proud that I maintained my cool throughout and was very even-tempered. I avoided taking bait from her for the most part, but I did follow up immediately or ask her in a friendly way to restate or clarify a couple of the things she spewed at me at certain points, and when I did, they tended to fall apart.
At one point she tried to trivialize our whole marriage. She said, "you know, when we got married, I just thought it would be something interesting to try, since I had never done it before, and since we'd been living together for so long already, I felt like it wouldn't be any big deal." I reminded her that we'd gotten engaged while we were still dating and hadn't even moved in together yet! We moved in together for the first time three months before we were married. "oh, yeah, right," was her answer. It's like she's rewritten a new narrative for our life together. It feels like Orwellian cognitive dissonance at times...
She absolutely had a smile on her face as she was saying some of the cruel things to me. Honestly it hurt, but at the same time I was in awe to see the fully-fledged WW emerge, like a spiteful mythical creature I had previously only heard rumors about. Very frightening when encountered in person.
I hope things don't end up in filing for D, but I do want to hear from a L as friends and family keep giving me all sorts of half-cocked legal advice and warnings I'm dubious about. Also, I want to have facts straight if W tests to see if I'm full of it.
I am hoping to hear from some of the vets as I definitely need more insight.
