I know that you are hurting and the hurt comes to the surface every time she contacts you. In her mind, she has not fully grasped the amount of hurt and pain that you have suffered and what the children have and continue to go through.
I think you are on the right track...the next time she contacts you, it wouldn't hurt to say "Hi, how are you doing?" and you might be surprised at her behavior. Sometimes, they do reach out to us because truly we are their lifeline. Yes, I know, they cut that cord when the Mother Ship left earth, but in their minds, they are still connected to us. Being polite doesn't mean that you are allowing her back into your life, it just makes it easier to get along for the sake of the children.
BTW, that is good news about your foot! You'll be ready for Six Flags and all the rides!
Just my two cents.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
