Yea I am taking my time also because she has not given me an answer for giving me the OK to let my boys visit with my family. Something that I thought she would give right away if I wanted it.
what does one have to do with the other? Are you using your reply as a bargaining chip? I don't recommend setting that precedent. You need to separate the two completely unrelated issues, decide what you want to do, and reply. You also need a firm answer from W about the children contacting your family. You should really push for this. You don't want to deprive them of their family.
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I have been playing in my head how it would play out if I was to use what She wants to get what I want.
Is this the kind of person you want to be? Keep your eye on the prize: what is in the best interest of your children.
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The most recent is she is asking me if we should sign them up for cub scouts but the day they have to go is her day with them but she will be at work late and has a babysitter looking after them until she gets home. It turns into a logistics puzzle for me to pick them up from her place from the babysitter then drop them off at her house after. It would mean more interaction with W, more coordination, I would hardly see the boys except for in car transport and it makes it hard for them to see me for such a short time then I am gone until its my turn with them again.
"but the day they have to go is her day with them". So how is this your business? Why are you trying to jump through hoops on a day they are with her?
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I want to tell W that we are not doing anything together with the kids for his birthday but part of me thinks why cant we just go out for dinner together? Oh that's right She doesn't want me as her husband, we don't do stuff together anymore. We did go out as a family for her birthday initiated by me. Then she never reciprocated back the whole summer as I did sat dark to her after that dinner.
I thin I am also reading way to much into this. I am thinking like this is her wanting to come back. I am sure it is not. but as you can see it has shook me. I was not expecting it.
I am still in In-house separation. It is not helpful to pretend my W and I are still together. It gives the children false hope and is dishonest. Also, the children can sense the tension. Your W wants to pretend that everything is normal. *mind-reading alert* This is probably to allay her own guilt at disrupting the family unit. But the reality is that the family was disrupted. There is no denying it anymore. Or, in your words:
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But I must reply, stand up for me, face the reality that we are still separated.
