In the UK - PT20 - Moved here!

[Huddy]

I have been doing some reading the past week. I've read HaWho's thread and some of the archive sections. I've re-done my homework, and I can see now, just how much of this sitch is MLC.

When I think back, my W started being 'funny' in May 2014. She was talking about old school friends and wanting to join Facebook in her old name to try and find them (she hasn't seen them for 30 years). Again, when I look back, the abusive language and name calling and language choice was the start of replay ('I wish I was as thin as when I met you', 'it's your fault I put on weight. If I hadn't met you I'd be thin') followed with 'I wish you were two stone lighter, like when we met' etc.

Obviously BD had the usual mix of nonsense etc. Being told I wasn't attractive to her anymore hurt. It all hurt, but so far in to the process now, and reading more stuff on the MLC side, it all starts to make sense. The cherry on the cake was this years' Tummy Tuck.

I'm looking backwards to see what might have sparked it. I know she had a mini MLC when she was 30, when SD was born. She is going through the menopause ('I feel like a dried up old bint'), but I was supportive and tried to get her to see the doctor. Looking far back, her Father tried to marry her off in an 'arranged' marriage, when she was 15. In fact, he's not her real Father, and I know she hasn't told her brothers and sisters about that. It caused real pain to my W, and she went to live with her Aunt for some years, not talking to her Father in all that time.

I guess all these factors have brought her to this. What I don't understand is why, if your past has been painful to some degree, would you want to replay that part of your life?

To more mundane. W brought over kids for tea yesterday and SD came too. W made a great fuss about buying my SD new catering knives for her college course. I don't know why, but I smiled and said great. W was wearing a 'see through' top with a black undergarment and high heel shoes. I noticed my SD was wearing similar....hmmmm.

Anyway, just my journaling thoughts on another week of MLC chaos! Thankfully, I am sane and coping well. Thinking about a weekend away in September to unwind.