NYGal: Together Again and Happy!

[EDF]

W won't tell ow not to contact her because: a)she's a people pleaser and can't take a stand....

I feel like this is just a variant of the earlier "she's too weak" rationalization, that might be clouding your judgement a bit. If you view her as too weak to be able to go NC, or "take a stand", I think that is letting her off too easy and sort of a crutch you use to justify you not enforcing your boundaries.

Realistically, she is showing she is more than willing and capable of making a stand, and unfortunately at the moment she seems to be taking a stand against what you need.

You're a great person, and if she loses you it's her loss, remember that!