Don't get too far ahead of yourself. It's easy to do, but it's a form of distorted thinking to start extrapolating. Like "H treated S badly", to "S won't have a father figure", to "S will do this to his children", to "My family's will now be broken and in pain for generations because of WAH!" Somewhere in that train of thought you have to pause and think maybe you're getting a little carried away.
Just because things hurt today doesn't mean they will in a year. Just because WAH is acting this way doesn't mean he will in a year.
It's obvious he feels the need to create some personal space for himself, to have his own boundaries, to be his own person. It's a power struggle, he is making the point to you, son, and himself, that he gets to do what he wants to do. Once you and son stop fighting him and he realizes that he gets to do what he wants, but that he lives with those consequences, he will likely realize that he doesn't really want to not see his son, or to not have a good relationship with him.
I personally wasn't a good father until BD for a number of reasons, but I've been closer with them than ever the last couple of years. I would do it again if I could, but we are currently a close family and all is well. They will know their dad, that is for sure.
Point is that people can change. I get upset with WAS's because they say things like "I can't spend the rest of my life like this" or "I don't like who you are" or "ILYBINILWY" acting like those are all permanent things, when in reality those things would all change if they waited them out for a few years. Let's not make the same mistake of assuming they will always be this way or making things more catastrophic than they are. They are bad enough already, no need to make them worse
Me:38 XW:38 T:11 years M:8 years Kids: S14, D11, D7 BD/Move out day: 6/17/14, D final Dec 15
