Its been a while since I've been on. I have not been keeping up as I usually like to. I've just been tired lately. Like completely fatigued. for the most part, I'm either working or with son, who certainly has some behavior issues. (When school starts it will get easier) I am vey stressed about making legal decisions, but I'm not sure if it's a good idea to post about it at present. Husband has hidden or depleted marital assets though and I feel forced to go a route I really don't want to. But I'm still having trouble. We only talk son logistics (which I prefer) except when husband wants something. Then he sends me friendly texts... Very insulting but I keep it at simple sentence responses. I'm finding that I want to talk about him less and less.
Zues, I have been thinking a lot about your post regarding dating. I don't necessarily disagree with what your saying, and I do go back and forth. And I too have thought some of the arguments that you pose.
These were some of my thoughts contradicting that argument.
1. Yes dating might be self medicating. So is drinking. So are anti depressants. (2 things I've stayed away from) Both have side effects. Sometimes we just need something to make life more pleasant. As long as we don't abuse it, do the benefits outweigh the side effects?
2. What is dating anyway? It's getting to know someone. Possibly for friendship or something more. Is getting to know someone really self medicating, or is it just opening your life up to new experiences, opinions, banter, company etc?
My favorite quote..."hell is other people". But then again, so is life.
3. Perhaps I'm healthier now then ever before. I know I'm a lot more laid back about people and life in general. I listen better. I'm less judgemental. I met my husband when I was in my early 20s. God. I would not want to be that person again! Yet I dated in my 20s, knowing so much less then I do now.
4. I don't know if I will ever be truly healed. I still haven't healed from that first relationship when I was 18! But I still pushed forward and had a 15 year relationship with my husband and a beautiful child. Waiting to be the best I can be would be like someone waiting to look like Arnold schwartzenneger before heading out to the beach. That can take years! And that person is missing out on the beauty and fun of being at the beach.
Anyway, these are just some quick thoughts. I'm not sure what or if there are correct answers. I look forward to exchanging ideas on this. I am going to try to catch up soon on all of my old friends posts. And resume journaling again.
