Anna 2.0

[Surfer]

Oh dear. This a very sad situation, but we have all probably done this and had this done to us. I was the guy who didn't talk at the end of my hard day. I just wanted some peace. I feel bad for this. I was never the one who attacked though. This was my W. she could win the 100m olympic nag/moan/arguments gold medal, with hurdles (massive ones)!!! Every time. I truly loved (and still love) my W, but as her sadness (potentially MLC in their too - now 40) developed it turned to anger. Even at sadness I was lost, because the person I tried to understand was talking a different language. I wish I had seen 'its not about the nail' and read etc about validation much more prior to this point. I could have potentially stopped things getting to a point where she detached and had an EA - I could have stopped the nuclear war!! Bu tI didn't, I regret this. As a LBH, be careful not to assume that he didn't care. I bet he did. We just sometimes don't communicate so well.Yes actions to have an affair, leave etc are all actions that I certainly don't approve of, but they probably come along because we are not communicating properly.

I almost texted my W, just now, to say:

"I have been thinking about those times when you just needed someone to talk to and I didn't fill that space. I just wanted you to know, I am so sorry. If I had understood how you were feeling more at the time and what you needed, I would have been there. I am just wanted to say I am so sorry for this and the loneliness you felt as a result."

However, I deleted it. Doesn't feel very detached. Not sure, perhaps I should just say this to her. I don't want to open up the door and hand be a stick to whack me with.....

Done that plenty.

Surfer.