I also wanted to add in that my wife says "I need time to work on myself"
and
"I have been in relationships for 10 years straight and it has taken a toll on me"
and
"I don't know what I want right now I am very confused"
I do believe there is a MLC going on here in addition to other things. But regardless of all that, I am willing to read these books and apply the techniques and be the change I want to see.