Cessna -- I'm no expert, but I do not think you should be inviting your W to dinners or events. She's made it clear that, right now, she wants nothing to do with you. For that to change, she has to get time and space and an opportunity to feel like losing you would be bad instead of an improvement. If you're repeatedly asking her to do things, it will simply make her focus on the large difference between the way you feel about her and the way she feels about you (right now), she'll feel smothered, and will withdraw further.
Have you read Sandi's rules? Cadet linked to them in one of the first posts in your thread. I'm linking it again here:
These are really, really good teachings for those of us in this unfortunate situation and represent thousands. You'll see that your exact question is answered, but there are lots and lots of other really great suggestions.
Hang in there!
Me: 46 W: 44 Married: 17 Together 21 D13; S10 BD: 03.03.15 (Not attracted to you) Almost 2 years trying, alone, to save marriage Status now: Divorced (effective 06.13.17)
