"I've decided to focus on my codependent stuff for a while and not him. I'm getting really tired of everything being about him."
I think the best way to get through situations like ours are to really work on our own codependency, build independence and detachment. All of which can be done whilst standing for the M. But I don't think much of a true R/M can be had with someone who is in the place where many WAS's/WS's on this site are.
And to keep the focus on him whilst he's doing some of the stuff he's doing is just torture IMHO. I'm not suggesting you give up on your M for a moment - it's more around you putting yourself first and knowing that you will be fine either way (shedding the codependent skin) as so many of us need to do..
So, how are you going to move forward with looking at this my friend...do you have some goals in mind?
Good luck with things and I will be cheering you on :)x
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
