More confused than before

[Buxom]

Thanks Andrew, being patient used to be easier when I lived more in denial.
I think I do a lot of things 'right' but when stressed, old habits come up. I was proud of myself giving him space when asked last night. I don't regret checking in with him either. He needed to know that I was aware and willing to hear what was going on. I forgot to mention earlier.... He did thank me this morning for checking in and for the being given the space before he acknowledged his unpredictability. I was impressed.

I think I'm good at validating but when it's your H may be not so good? I approached him by saying, 'I noticed you seemed quiet in the car and then angry as we got closer to home, would u like to talk?' He spit out, no, with an edge and said leave me alone. I said yes I will and I'm here when u r ready. I then had lighthearted chats with both the kids within earshot and was no taking it personally. Getting better at that.
He was calmer by lights out and we wished each other good night and I went to my room and closed the door. Thinking back I see that he was in a mood prior to the concert and I did not sit next to him there. That's a change for me.

I like your tips on showing caring. Actions over words. I appreciate a guy's opinion since I'm not of the same mind. He is processing a lot and I'm focused on staying out of the way. I could confront all sorts of things, I just don't judge the time to be right. I'll keep in mind not to press things!

Anyway, thanks for your check in, male mind and encouragement Andrew !