As Ive mentioned before, I am divorced for some time and have a new partner. A couple weeks back, my new partner (who knows of this site and my activity here) asked me an interesting question:
"Do you use the strategies or tactics that you talk about on this site on me?"
My answer was like this.
Yes and no. The way I see the information from this site is that there are really two steps. For example, when you are digging a hole, first you need to stop digging, and then you can climb out. The methods on here related to stopping to dig (such as the 37 rules, going dark, acting as if, etc) arent really applicable in a good relationship. On the other hand, the items related to climbing out of the hole (goal setting, validating, listening, communicating, love languages, etc) are valid regardless of whether you are trying to maintain or repair a relationship. These are valuable life and relationship skills regardless of the relationship status. I said, Im working regularly to incorporate those into my life and our relationship regardless of my activity on this site.
So I thank you to all who have taught and continue to teach me many life lessons on how to be a part of a successful relationship.
