I am taking one thing from this. Giving less of a sh!t is working for you CT.
Sure, it works! B/c it helps the H to detach and let go. So what if she gets mad and throws a fit? Who cares? She uses her anger to control! Women who throw fits and bully, do it to control. If you guys have not learned that by now, please jot it down. When she sees she cannot bully her H to get her way, then she'll try a different way to get it. (But that's another lesson).
Quote:
It surely does help me detach, and nothing could feel more unnatural, but I am doing it anyway. And my WW only briefly tried to use bully tactics. But WW's will try a different way as you state - they try no contact of their own, but what my WW mostly used was affection. I think the bullying would have made me wake up a whole lot faster when I was believing the lies before I got here.
All W's may not respond exactly alike, but if they are wayward, their goal is the same. Want to know what it is? To be free of everything she deems made her unhappy, and to go out there and find the life/man that fulfills her needs. Her selfishness will override any nice-guy attempts to convince her to give the M another chance. Selfish desires trump everyone and everything. So, however she may respond to him, he'd better be tough enough to handle her.
That's right, its about what the man needs to earn, not what he deserves. A WW will never give self-respect unless the man gives it to himself first. I am an LBS any longer, I am my own independent man. Would very much like to be W's H again, but both those people are on ice right now, time will tell if they thaw.
Sandi, I am handing you a trophy right now. Not b/c I agree or disagree, but for your efforts to facilitate understanding.
"There is no more important fight than the one for ourselves. Keep on winning." Ginger1, Read her newbies. BD: Feb '16 D: Mar '17 Piecing: Putting the self back together was my piecing. S6
