[123Gwen]

Bright - so very, very happy for you on the condo and how you are handling the twists and turns of H without letting it rain on you. Seriously major changes from your posts last year. I hope I can achieve the type of growth and grace you have shown.

I have to confess my friend I worried about you in the past. Not because you weren't smart and capable and strong but because you seemed to struggle in your posts with those tenacious threads of life in the in between.

Our situations are not the same because my H is a vanisher and avoider and has continued to create a life on MLC island with OW.He avoids our D's and continues to isolate himself from long time friends...These all seem to be obvious signs of D but yet he has never files for D and continues to friend me on FB. Very different but the confusion is still there for me and I can imagine how difficult it would be with business ties and vacation condos.

Life of the long term separated is uncharted waters. I struggle with what it means in my heart. The advantages of the practicalities of life (I.E. - insurance, taxes, etc.) are definitely a factor but sometimes I find myself having to defend my choice not to divorce and that sets me back emotionally. I think we spouses living in the land of in between are not respected and that takes it's toll over time.

Your recent posts have inspired me and comforted me and helped me feel that life in the in between can be achieved in style. So good to hear about all your are doing and how you are achieving a bright spot of paradise on your terms.

Can't wait to see what unfolds.