Aftermath

[TimR]

Just journaling...
Quick note since I have not been journaling for some time. Relationship with the GF has been going great. Some minor emotional set backs due to the insecurities WW has created in me. However, I have spoken with GF about them and expressed that yes I know these are my issues but when I experience them I just need some time to work through them. My major issue right now is going through phases when "I see the end coming." Working through them means acknowledging how I am feeling and recognizing this is something I making up in my mind because something else is bothering me. Right now that something else is fear and panic about my dog being in poor health. Also acknowledging GF is not the same person as WW and even if she is going to cheat as WW there is nothing I can do about it, so just to enjoy the time we have together. That letting go of control helps a lot.

Physically, I have kept up with my work outs and while I have not completed my goal yet of running in a 5K, I have ran further on my own and do not really need an organized run to recognize my progress. I also got back into cycling, an activity I enjoyed prior to WW. One or two better than the 5k (and which I am nervous about) is that this weekend I will ride my first Century ride/race. After spending more than I should have on extra gear, I believe I am ready.

As far as the boys... Unfortunately for them I am no longer there as the buffer between WW and them. So WW's moods and temper get taken out on them. Idk and never will how a person can blindly ruin their relationship with their own kids. Both contact me much more and come to visit. My relationship with them has improved and continued. Sadly, their moods are not always chipper dealing with WW.

Finally there is the D. 90 days are up and now despite complaining until I filed WW now will not sign the papers unless I pay her...LMAO. So I guess I will be waiting 2 years for it to be final.