I want to take her aside and say this: ow, do you have a moment? Good, because I just wanted to tell you to leave us alone. When you decided to try out a new sexual orientation just for kicks, and insert yourself in the middle of our relationship, you became the ow, the homewrecker, and with that you lost the privilege of being friends with my W. As far as I'm concerned, you are morally bankrupt and ethically void. You showed no concern whatsoever for me, and no respect for my relationship with W. That you think you can still be friends with her after an A only reinforces the fact that you have no regard for our R, and no decency whatsoever. Furthermore, your inability to keep confidential private conversations and details about employees' dismissal makes you unfit to be head of HR. So stay away from me. Stay away from W. And don't ever contact either one of us again(and here's what I really want to say but I won't) or I will let [her boss] know that she is taking a risk and putting [our place of employment] at risk by promoting you to lead HR. And finally, (in my dreams I say this) you can take your feminist retirement home in Paris (the one she wrote to W about) and shove it. Good, I feel better already.
The stuff in blue is something your wife should be saying to OW...not you. You saying it does nothing - likely OW would turn right to your W and laugh about it.
The stuff in red is completely unrelated to you and your situation. I understand and agree that this OW is a morally deficient barnacle, but that doesnt mean that her professional ethical decisions are really related to the affair. You can be upset about those kinds of things, but to blend it into the affair is causing you to punish your W in ways she doesnt deserve. What it reads is that you are so upset that your W "chose" this ethically bankrupt piece of garbage over you (for some amount of time) that you are flinging all of this around trying to prove your superiority.
Your focus should be on the contact your wife is having with this woman. Anything else that you focus on with OW is only holding you back. You are so bent out of shape about her promotion...and while it sounds unmerited, it really impacts you not at all.
I am really worried about you NYG. Since the beginning, I fear your focus has always been so heavily on OW. How can you break that so that YOU and your RELATIONSHIP can heal?
