NYG - I don't think it is on you to "let this go".
I'm not sure you should DO anything just yet.
But you can't just allow this boundary to be crossed without any issue. What if W said she just needed to sleep with OW one more time "for closure"? Would you be expected to just "let that go" too? NO, THAT WOULD NOT BE OK. THE LUNCH WAS NOT OK EITHER. I SCREAMED AT HER FOR HOURS OVER THAT ONE. NOT A GOOD MOVE, I ADMIT.
This is about you now. I think your sole focus has been on repairing your R with W. What do you need to heal? I NEED TO KNOW THERE IS NO CONTACT WITH OW. EVER. AND NOT WITH HER FRIENDS, EITHER. SEE BELOW.
It has been a difficult week. I lost my temper and didn't calm down for about 3 days after W had lunch with ow. Then on Friday W got a text from ow's friend -- ANOTHER person who works at the same place we all do -- this bestie was encouraging the A all along, so I'm not real thrilled that she is contacting W. The text read "so what does moving forward look like for you?" I get that it was in response to a text W sent, obviously saying she was moving forward. And W thought she was justified in texting with ow's bestie, and that her message was honorable. But then why did she delete the previous texts? And why was she texting with her after we discussed, and I thought she agreed, that it wouldn't be a good idea to stay in touch with this person?
I see it as a way to get messages back and forth, with bestie acting as the intermediary. And furthermore, it's none of her business what W means by moving forward!!! I don't want ow or her friends to know anything at all about me or about us.
So it really got to me, and I was pretty mean to W all weekend. I also found an old slip of paper with the name of the hotel they chose to consummate the A, so it's no wonder I was triggered. I really do not think W wants to be in touch with ow. I think I'm pushing and pushing and pushing her to see what the breaking point is, and I think I've found it. We aren't speaking today. Rough day.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
