My first reaction to your story is about what your H must have thought (or not thought) he was doing to his kids. Leaving a note w/ his ring out in the open, and later telling them by himself that you won't be together ... just sounds like your boys are not the highest priority for him right now. Makes me want to kick him in the ass. WTF. To me that's the most heartbreaking part.
Your feeling intensely lonely now -- I get that. I am too. But don't let that fear grip you. I'm sure there are many possible relationships out there for you, should your current M not work out. Just saying... resolving loneliness is not a hugely insurmountable problem. (But rebuilding your M is.)
The obvious issue -- that I'm sure you realize -- is that at this point your marriage isn't something that can be fixed directly and collaboratively. You can change yourself, but your H is majorly confused and has a ton of stuff he's gotta work out for himself.
You didn't get into it but ... it sounds like he's not a particularly good earner? Do you provide most of the family income? You mentioned kicking him out of the house -- is the house somehow just yours? You don't both own the house? Also, you seem to have a fair amount of disposable income, what with your trip to Costa Rica ... while your H doesn't have "the money you wanted for August." Was his income an issue?
Me: 50, MLC/WW 45 Young kids Nov 2015: BD1 Apr 2016: BD2 Jan 2017: W filed Feb 2017: D final
