Detaching.....nearly there..

[Surfer]

Re. The WW needing to suffer a loss. My WW has gone gone on holiday with the kids and her single girlfriend (recently divorced with a child). The kids will be happy so I am happy with that - to some extent (would rather it is just us but..). Yet it feels like cake eating a bit (TBH) - as when she left she left by clearing out a lot of money I invested for her. Anyway that is done. My point is, it's hard for her to feel financial pressure as such (Ie the money she took), also she probably doesn't need company right now - she has her friends (presuming the EA has ended and there is nobody else) IDK if here is anyone, but I doubt it. She does feel work pressure and day to day stress which she struggles with however. The point I am making here is perhaps this point of her suffering a loss or realising the grass isn't greener might never happen - I guess so what - GAL and enjoy your life Surfer. Stop navel gazing, mind reading and trying to see into the future! I appear to be talking to myself here (oh dear).

I spoke to my L today and said whilst things feel better at the moment, less arguing, her hanging around a bit more (trying to get a bit of attention) and very little contact and arguments otherwise I do wonder about issuing proceedings. Again, I know the answer. Reconciliation does not work this way - but it might shock her. THen again that would essentially be manipulative and might not work (there I go again talking to myself - going to change my name to Surfer's' as there appears to be more than one of us - ha ha.

I guess just sit back and see how it goes is the answer really.

I do have one question I am struggling with, last time my W went abroad on holiday, with girlfriends (just over a month ago), I took her to the airport. A 3 hour round trip. Sandi was asked why would I do that - helping her eat cake I presume were her thoughts. However my DB coach said it was a good thing as we talked properly and genuinely for 1.5 hours. He felt it was the right thing to do as it cared a good interaction. She thanked me a lot also......

So to cut to the chase at last........I didn't take her and the kids to the airport yesterday, it wouldn't have worked for me so I did it offer and she didn't ask. I would like to pick them up when they come back, as I will have missed them. SHould I offer to pick them up to create good interactions or should I do a 180 and not offer?

Any thoughts?....