Thanks for the response Michlynn, this is in fact the second letter. In the first letter I made no promises to her and said that I would only show her by my actions, which I have done. I have not had any out burst of anger, and in fact have not felt any anger in quite sometime, all I feel is anxiety over the fact that I may be losing the woman I love and my two little girls. I used to spank my little girl when ever she did something bad, I cannot and will not do that again because even before, when I did spank her, it always hurt me to see her cry. I am reading DR right now, and I have found that I have been already doing some of what Michele says to do in that book.
My wife and kids went to Houston this weekend with my MIL and FIL, and I am so lonely in this big ol house, I can hardly stand it. I do not think I will be able to cope with being alone all of the time if my wife divorces me, when ever I look at her I feel so much love towards her and so much disgust at myself for ever belittling her. I know it will take time for her to regain trust in me, if she ever does, but all I can hope is that she grants me that time and doesn't file for D. You would have to understand me to know where I'm coming from, my family, meaning my W and 2 daughters are the MOST important people in the world to me and keeping this family together is my top priority. Through my MantoMan accountibility/support group, my faith in our Lord God, my Anger Management Therapy, and my own will power, I WILL NOT backslide back to that old guy. In fact, I view that guy as having passed away, never to be resurrected.
"Anyone who is among the living, has hope." (Eccl 9:4)
