I'm sorry that things didn't go well w/your son. It does sound like you and your W need to be on the same page. She's attempting to sabotage your relationship w/your son by telling him that you are the reason that things are being done a certain way. Maybe it's time that you, your wife and son sat down in one room, together, and had a discussion about why things are happening the way that they are. (If that is possible.)
Wet, I know you are very frustrated, but you need to find a way to remain calm in front of your son. Yelling at the Taco Bell person and then raising your voice in frustration over the situation w/your son flipped his switch and he had to get away from you for a while. He may very feel like he's caught in the middle and is at fault for all of the frustration and anger being displayed. Is it possible that he hears a lot of yelling and voice raising over at his mother's?
Wet, maybe you need to contact him and apologize. I know, it's a difficult thing to do, but you've got to be the bigger and better person here and show him just what is to be a man and own up to your frustration and anger over the situation. I would hate to see this situation widen the gap between father and son.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
