I had to cut that short because W came into the room. I slept in the spare bedroom again last night. I alternately crave her reassurances that it was just to finally close the door on the A and then I am appalled that she still felt she needed to. She actually said maybe her seeing ow one last time is what we needed to get closer. I looked her in the eye and said it might make you feel closer to me but for me it's like being shot out of a cannon across the city as far from YOU as I could go.

I'm filled with images and thoughts of ow. She's everywhere all the time and I don't know how to get her out of my head. And tomorrow she's expecting to get a huge promotion and raise and I will have to see all the announcements about that. (We all work at the same place.) She has made a pattern of revealing confidential information about employees - staff misconduct that resulted in sanctions and in a few cases the employees were fired. She reveals the confidential details to whomever she's sleeping with that day. And her last three lovers were co-workers. So she's a land mine who shouldn't be promoted in the position she has. But that land mine would blow my legs off if I tell. So I shut up.

Time to start my day and try my hardest to let this go.

11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker
Reconciling since late April 2016
Don't give up until it's time, then move on
Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat