So before today I had not been stressed about receiving D papers. Earlier I had a really bad feeling that today was the day that I was going to get them.... I talked myself out of it while I was at work. I thought positive thoughts and told myself that it wasn't the worst thing that could happen. That I had things to be grateful for....

And then I got home and I got the papers.... And now I feel like I'm falling apart.... I do not want this divorce and I'm so frustrated that W isn't even willing to put in a single ounce of effort and I fully believe that this is a mistake....

I have accepted that I can't change her mind and there's really nothing I can do about any of this except to work on myself... But it's hard not to just wish that she would slow down.... W didn't even move out a month ago... It all feels so rushed.

W:32 M:26
T:5 yrs M: 3 yr
BD: JUN 2016
W Moved out: early JUL 2016
W Filed for D: mid JUL 2016
EA: 06/16?
PA: 07/16
Moved in w/ ow: 07/16
D final: 10/16