Still keeping it real...

[123Gwen]

Hit the two year mark since husband left and I find myself looking forward 90% of the time. The old saying - "time heals all wounds" has some merit but I think the idea of healing up for debate. The scars remain and they never completely heal but hopefully their existence will be less defining in my life.

Life goes on - youngest graduated and it was a day full of contradictions. I have no desire to rehash but these last few months have brought me a lot of clarity for my role in unhealthy patterns and how my FOO contributed both in positive and negative ways. I have been owning and changing things so moving forward I will not repeat unhealthy behaviors and will learn to practice better relationship skills while remaining independent. I am trying to be politically correct but in the end I am going to remain open minded to new experiences but MLC has made me hesitant to trust again. It is the reality right now and that may never change but maybe it will...

Anyway right after graduation we got to take our extended trip abroad. It was wonderful in every way and absolutely the best RX. A complete success for the girls and for me both personally and as a family.

Returned to enjoy a nice summer before both girls head to university. Oldest leaves next week and youngest leaves in three weeks. Lots of changes but determined to continue to move forward in a positive light.

I guess I have dropped the rope. I keep up on the board from time to time. I read about your heartache and triumphs. I find myself feeling physically ill when I read a new post from someone just trying to understand MLC and trying everything to connect with their spouse. I am comforted by the posts of wise people who comfort and guide and support each other. I cheer at my kitchen table when I read a post from someone that got through the day without crying or found a new job. Each day the LBS survived and ultimately thrived is such a sweet gift.

Thank you so much for being so brave and for sharing. I think in the last two years the biggest lesson for me has been that MLC is real. Divorcebusting for the LBS is about saving yourself. MLC means standard relationship rules no longer apply and the spouse you married does not exist. Don't be fooled into thinking otherwise after BD. MWD is giving you the best advice no matter what the outcome.

I long for a day when this board is not needed but I think in the world we live in with the stress and focus on "do what makes you happy" it will be more vital than ever we support each other.