New here and separated

[Coly23]

Starting to feel down again and very tearful. Had a really good cry before I left for work this morning and thought that would be it but this afternoon is tough as well. Just started thinking that August is going to be an awful month when usually it is a month of celebrations. D15 and me will be going on holiday without H for the first time in eight years, the day we get back will be our sixth wedding anniversary and two days after that will be my birthday. I am hoping the holiday will help me detach and maybe knock the one day a week family evening on the head so H and D15 make their own plans to see each other. The only problem is because I don't know what is going on in H's head I can't tell if this is helping him to reconnect to me. I have set my goals and one of the ways I will know if we are reconnecting is if he contacts me to find out how I am.... Do you think I should continue with the arrangement for a few more weeks and then if no progress towards my goals then try something else or should I keep going and if so for how long? We have had a couple of false starts with this arrangement and my daughter seems to like it but every time he goes home it tears me apart...