Oi (with a slap to my forehead)! So, I am TOTALLY expecting that he could be living in his parents' basement at some point?!? Hopefully they live too far for that?
Recently, I have fantasies about shipping my h back to my MIL! He can recreate the whole darn thing with her. She already lives with her other son Monday - Friday as she cares for their son. (And when I last visited that 50 year old son was in the basement A LOT. And this was when no one was using the living room?!? Might as well add my h to the mix so she can finish up her parenting stint.)
My MIL just sent me a really sappy Hallmark card for my birthday. The message inside made me laugh outloud. She has some inkling that something is (very) wrong with her s but she just pretends it's not happening.
The left hand side of the card says (from Hallmark) that she is grateful she does not have to worry at all about her son and grandchildren because they have my love and my love will carry them through.
Is she pushing me towards co-dependence??? Is there a whole Hallmark 'co-dependent' card section I don't know about? Maybe next to the 99 cent cards?!? (She has not returned any of my calls or texts from when she first learned something was 'off' with her son. And we used to talk a lot. This makes the card all the more disingenuous.)
Then, the right hand side was the hilarious part. From Hallmark, it says that the reason I have built such a great family life is because of who I am and all that I have given to my family.
Umm. Hmm. Yes! I am really reaping some serious benefits over here. I wanted to send the card back and edit this part to say: "actually, your son has moved downstairs to a recreated childhood bedroom he keeps under 24/7 lock and key. He only comes out to leave the house, use the bathroom in the hall (he locks and unlocks the door in between), eat dinner or grab food from the kitchen. Life with him most resembles living with a feral cat. I hope you are enjoying ignoring me and all that is going on over here! Love, Hawho."
Point is, it could be worse. You could be on the hook for that house, too.
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
