Just to play devil's advocate ... What about all the "data" here, that says in-house separation rarely leads to reconciliation? Maybe you (we) have to destroy the marriage in order to save it. Maybe a 1-2 year in-house S is pointless?
It's all about the children. I often think I'd have a much better chance of reconciling with her if she moved out (no way am I going to), and I know I'd feel better, right now, if I didn't see her all the time, which leads to false hope and no detachment. But I believe pretty strongly that the more time the kids have with us before it has to happen that the better they'll be able to withstand the dynamics that screw so many kids up.
Me: 46 W: 44 Married: 17 Together 21 D13; S10 BD: 03.03.15 (Not attracted to you) Almost 2 years trying, alone, to save marriage Status now: Divorced (effective 06.13.17)
