Detaching.....nearly there..

[RSG]

Yeah Surfer, I had the same problem for a while but got the hang of it. Validating is confirming you have heard and know what she is uneasy about regardless of your feelings on the situation. "I understand you are uncomfortable about this..." and the like. Likely (like my WW) she has felt "unheard" by you because you offered solutions to the problems she's talking about rather than just listening. I don't quite understand this myself, but I continue to read this fact about women in all sorts of areas so didn't question it!

As of now, from her POV you're basically ignoring her.....which she's probably felt for a while. You don't have to like a word she says, but always try to confirm to her that you have heard what she has an issue with.

Good luck! It's hard to begin with, but you get the hang of it.