Today is hard. Even after all the distractions. I [censored] love her but i have to cast her out my heart and mind.

I feel for my boy and it breaks my heart when he tears up and asks "wheres Mummy?". I cant answer him. I just say "its okay i love you".

If it was just me i'd go dark and cast it all away but i cant. I have to deal with my Son's broken heart too. That hurts me more than anything. I have to stop myself from thinking about it when im out in public lest the tears come forth.

Sorry rant.

Me31 W31 M11yrs S6yrs
23Mar16-BD
9Apr16-W admitted EA w boss.
27Jun16-W Changed job and promised NC w OM.
14Jul16-Continued contact w OM.Start of Separation.
24May17-Divorced.