If he is having a PA then I would recommend condoms bare minimum if you have sex. Even then they can't protect against HPV so think about that. The DB coaches are an invaluable source of guidance and support but you have to live with your choices, no one else.

Someone once described pursuing to me like this:

Pretend you are standing on a football field and there is a huge Styrofoam block between you and you WH. When you pursue and walk toward WH the block pushes him back. So either retreat or stand still but don't call, text, walk towards him, nothing.

At best find somewhere else to be, keep calls brief (and he needs to call) end them on a light note but be the one to end the call. Find something to do that really makes you happy. Joy and confidence are a huge turn on universally. So you have to find your joy from within and not from your partner. Remember a time before you were partnered, how you behaved, how you came across.

Recently I regressed a bit with my WH and I think it's because I have been too available to him. I found myself calling him a few times a day and he was becoming more aloof again. Before this I had been very good about not initiating calls and keeping things short, sweet and ending the calls myself. I think I've started coming across clingy again so I am stepping back again. Initially this was very difficult for as I wanted to constantly temp check him, but that was just driving me nuts. So back to the drawing board. Do what works, and in my case it helped when I just wasn't so available to him. He tends to miss me when I am doing my own thing and not chasing him.

M 10yrs T 13yrs
BD #1Oct 2015-PA between WAH and COW
BD #2 April 2016-WH resumed PA, she broke it off
Jan 2 2017 WH says he wants divorce
April '17-Letting go
2018 D busted
DD8, DS6, DS3