Hi Rouky, thank you for your thoughts on it, I really appreciate it. I'm so sad about it, I think it maybe too late. I just don't see how I can ever love H like I used to after putting me through all this. Also, it worries me that I feel happier when he is not here, but I don't know if this is because of everything he has put me through or because I genuinely would be happier without him. He text me on Tuesday to say he loved me. I didn't know how to respond - I don't feel love for him, I just feel angry towards him. Ironically, I liked it better when he wasn't saying he wanted to work it out. Maybe he just took too long? I don't know. It is keeping me awake at night. I know our children would be over the moon to here he was coming home so now I feel like I'm the guilty one for maybe not wanting him to.
I wonder if this is how everyone who has pieced felt in the beginning?
