I made the mistakes again: calling her, sending her flowers, letters.
Learn from your mistakes. I've read that repeating the same actions and expecting different results is the definition of insanity. I have been guilty of it, and observed a lot of people doing it.......so maybe we all are a little crazy, especially when it comes to relationships. I do want to encourage you to remember what worked and what didn't work in the past.
When you and your W went back together after the first affair, was there any counseling about the affair and how to deal with it? Have you asked her family if there was any history of issues in her childhood?
Did you just take her word that you were never really divorced and were still married, or did you check it out and see if the D papers had been filed?
Quote:
I had the perfect marriage. A loving wife, two beautiful children, our own house, in laws that love me...happy life.
Your W cared nothing about spending quality time and attention with her own children, or doing anything with her new house. It sounds as if she stayed awayed from the house as long as she could, before finally going home. You did all the work at home, raised the kids, and held down a full time job. My first thoughts were that you were badly deceived, or you could be seeing life with distorted vision. My second thoughts were there that your W could have a serious problem.
You say you and W had the perfect M and went for seven years without having an argument. Never an argument? How did you accomplish that? Happy wife --- happy life? How did you keep her happy during that time?
What are the ages of you and W?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
