First phone coaching session and I'm more confused than ever!! He's withdrew more and more this week almost like he's doing 180 on me. Feels like pressure to submit. He told me he liked the independent, uncomplicated me from the past and now that I'm working on that, more forme than anyone, he's snarling or silent treatment. Hate it as we used to be so passionate , in sync, and best friends. He even said last month he missed our connection and friendship. I do too!!!
So coach thinks he's MLC and sex addicted, not just about the affairs. She says that's a different approach. Please tell me what u know as we ran out of time!!!!
Her instructions were: 1. Breathe, it's been five years at least of this turmoil
2. Be friends with him, develop a good solid friendship again. Read his body language and if not closed or angry then Talk about light things and pretend he's a friend as a guest in my home. 3. Don't pursue so as to create resistance? 4. Give him space, esp when hes taking space. 5. Be unpredictable 6. Read DR, five love languages and gottzman book seven principles to make marriage work. I'm reading DR, have read love language and ordered the other. 7. Emotionally detach, my biggest weakness. I have my own rollercoaster and then I ride his most times too! Need help here, lots of help! 8. Be a cat, not a puppy 9. She thinks it's ok for me to try and have sex with him. Is this because She thinks he's a sex addict and I have to connect there???
Thoughts? Like I said, I'm confused. I'm going away for a few days to house sit for a friend with an old dog. WH said, "sounds like good timing all around..." whatever that means!?!
Me54 WH48 S18 D16 M 22 T 24 EA-PA-EA 2011-2015 Separated 10/14 - 06/15 BD1 02/14 BD2 05/16 BD3 08/21/16 and began drinking again Working on me and liking me again
