My wife walked out 3

[RSG]

I'm starting to do that actually. It's not easy sometimes.

I picked up little guy today at 5, and traffic was so awful it took us 45 more minutes to travel the 5+mi to get home. W text and ask how his day was. Not really important, so I don't answer. Bedtime comes around, she calls 3 times and texts "why are you doing this?" I didn't answer the first call because I was going downstairs to fill his cup with milk, she called the other 2 times while I was downstairs.

I responded to the text and said he's about to go to bed. She calls again and texts saying she'd like to speak to S, so I let it through. She rubs her eyes and gets angry that I haven't given her an update because "she always does." She asks me to let her know how dropoff goes tomorrow, and I say fine but I'm not going to. It's really unnecessary, especially since she can check the cameras.

My question is, when she gets huffy and asks why I'm not giving her updates "when I (she) always clearly communicate about him" what should I say? I don't want to get ugly, but I feel it's unnecessary mostly and not realistic for our status as S spouses. Incidentally, I posted a picture of him on FB with the caption "Magic is when this kid looks at you and says I want a hug." She was the first to like it. And when she changed from a phone call to Facetime to see him, she rubbed her eyes like she's been crying and said she was just coming from the gym.

It feels so counterproductive to do this so firmly. I know DB says that means you're exactly right and to keep going, but making her angry just doesn't feel like it's drawing her to me. She mentioned "I've got enough on my plate without 'this'..." I'm not sure what that means, and I don't dare ask. That said, I wouldn't want her to come home eventually just because it means she would see S. I want her to commit to our M because of love and a desire to be a family. How does becoming a near black hole accomplish that? I'm not saying I'm going to do anything differently, I'd just like to hear the logic behind it.

Thanks gang!!