11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Another question... When you guys got back together did she say when you went dim had any affect on her? Before this past week when I said I have to let go we used to text all day long...I thought it was cake eating and I wanted to do something different....
Thanks!!
W:42 M:48 T:9 yrs M:1yr BD: Feb 2016 EA Confirmed: Feb 2016/PA July 2016 D: Feb 2017
She didn't say directly, but she did say she was worried she would lose me the entire time, if she didn't wise up soon! I still don't know what changed things for her, but it happened while she was on vacation with ow. And just before they left I thought I blew it when I insisted she tell me if she was done with me or not "because I need to make some decisions about my future." I thought it was over, because it was NOT good DB technique at all. I was not cool, calm and collected, I was desperate and frightened. But it shook her up. A week later, while still on vacay, she texted that she wanted to talk about us and would I be willing. I somehow knew it was going to be about reconciliation or I would have panicked. I also had the benefit of knowing through a mutual friend that W was trying to come back to me, and knew it was the right thing and the thing that would make her most happy... but she had to do it on her own timeline. I found out later that that apparently meant they had to go on the #^^@! vacation they had planned. I could have been really angry about that, but it turns out that all that time with ow made her realize I was the better choice.
Yeah, it stinks to be a choice, but at least she made the right one.
And don't worry about the texting having fizzled somewhat. It gives her something to think about. Let her wonder what you are up to. Be strong and always look your best if she might see you. That's what I tried to do.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Ok, great advice once again NYGal!! You make me laugh....I have been keeping up with my working out and tanning so I do look my best...she has actually been so depressed and has a back issue and can't workout she has gained some pounds.....yikes...what we do for love....haha
W:42 M:48 T:9 yrs M:1yr BD: Feb 2016 EA Confirmed: Feb 2016/PA July 2016 D: Feb 2017
Nygal, it's great to hear that you have reconciled. I remember when you came here first; it's like another person is here now. You've come on leaps and bounds in a small amount of time. And just goes to show how db-ing works. Very happy for you and wish you the best of luck.
I myself find myself here again, I don't think I've ever properly left. And now I'm pregnant and h is still threatening d.
Me 26 H 25 M 4 T 5 Baby born 4/14 BD: 1/15 EA: 2/15 PA: 4/15 reconciling: 4/15 ILYBINILWY- 11/15 ILY-1/16 ILYBNILWY 4/16 ILY 6/16 ILYBINILWY 6/16 Baby due 3/17 BD 8/16
Wow, Cherry. I'm going to have to catch up on your situation! Thanks for your encouraging words above and throughout my time on here. Yeah, I was a wreck on here for so long. Afraid of making the wrong move, and so obsessed with getting my relationship back. I know that DB helped. And I think I'm lucky, too. I just hope more people on here can keep on trying and that their spouses find their way back home to stay. Sometimes that's not the best solution, I know that, but it seems that the folks who take the time to come here are still fighting for their marriages. I definitely think it's worth fighting for.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
Thanks everyone! There were times when it felt hopeless, but I never really gave up fighting for my M.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
When you guys got back together did she say when you went dim had any affect on her? Before this past week when I said I have to let go we used to text all day long...I thought it was cake eating and I wanted to do something different....