Third time's a charm, I hope.

[bodhi]

Hi, sorry that you are here- but welcome. I guess some db-ers would say you don't need to respond to this message.

Thanks for the welcome! Sorry you're here as well, from your signature it seems like you've been on quite the rollercoaster Hoping things improve for you again though!

I'm guessing too that no response here will probably be the best. The thing is that, as people who are living separately and have no kids, I'm afraid the next communication will just be him alerting me that he's filing paperwork. He has no reason to reach out to me otherwise, and we've only spoke about the logistics of separation since this occurred.

I backslid majorly on Saturday by talking about reconciliation. He said that he didn't see any way that the marriage could possibly work. I told him that I had a suggestion, but didn't want to bother with discussing it because he seemed to already have made his decision. He eventually pried it out of me and I told him I thought it would be a good idea if we just stay separated for awhile and eventually go to counseling, while still living separately.

He told me that he thinks that would only get us to a point where we would be happy enough to get back together, and that everything would be the same afterwards and that he's afraid of being arrested again. I tried reasoning that the point of counseling was to work on fixing things before ever even thinking of reconciling, and that he didn't have anything to lose by going to counseling. However, he's deathly afraid of being arrested again.

I'll be honest when I say that I made the threat of this. I'm so remorseful for it. He said so many terrible things about me, attacks both on my body and my personality, and also said things that made no sense about him deserving alimony from me, and also said he was getting a lawyer after (per his request) we agreed to leave lawyers out of the equation. I foolishly reminded him that I could reopen the closed case at any point and threatened to get a lawyer of my own.