Detaching.....nearly there..

[Surfer]

I have a question for you.....my wife suffered a loss last year (a young relative of hers). I suffered the same loss but, of course, the pain was less intense for me. The anniversary of this loss is coming up and I know my wife is feeling the pain. Do I send her a card/flowers to acknowledge her difficult time - or do I remain detached (we still communicate about kids etc)?