NYGal: A New Chapter and Hopeful!

[PacLove]

NYGal,

Thanks for the reply - yes I'm very familiar with the lighthouse story and have it on my phone to remind me to read it regularly. I too am practicing kindness but with some boundaries. I'm even doing the odd "act of kindness" for W, but only when she asks - nothing unprompted for now as they generally go unrecognized or can be seen as pursuing.

I've been pretty good at limiting contact unless needed for finances/kids. She often reaches out to me at least once a day with something, either an update or a question - often times things she could have found herself.

I have my healthy boundaries, ie she sleeps in the guest bedroom when staying at the house, I need to be a little stronger on finances which is a discussion we'll have when she gets back, and she knows not to come by the house on the nights/weekends that aren't hers.

Congrats on the reconciliation - it's so great to hear stories where the S is returning to make things work, certainly gives me hope. I hope everything works out for both of you and you can have a happy life together! how long have you been together?