Betsey - to answer your question, to be a friend in my definition of the word. it doesn't mean it would have to have "hopes of reconciliation" attached to it. it just means i'm not going to be her friend when it is one sided and a fair weather friendship on her terms and when she can fit me into her life. i will not accept anything less than what i want, if she can't provide that then i guess we won't be friends, we'll be somthing else in my mind. acquaintences or whatever that may be. it is about me now and what is good for me. any thoughts from anyone?
Betsey, Wonder, Karen and everyone else, thanks for being good friends and helping me through this process. Its been really theraputic.
Karen - I totally agree with you. I'm not doing anything really anymore. I'm not even really wanting to respond when she initiates contact, but I usually do at some point, just not jumping at the chance at all. my responses have been casual, no pressure, but caring and validating. its really tough when i have no desire to really spend my time listening to her brainwashed words.
thats where this whole friend thing is tough for me. beyond the fair weather one sidedness, i really don't have any interest in "being there" for her on her terms and then when i am, i'm not really interested in most of the things she has to say. some stuff yes, but mostly no. so what do i get out of it? why should i continue being there for her, being her friend?
