So why I'm still holding on to the rope: because I'm scared to be on my own and be single for the rest of my life, so by over analysing H's actions it gives me hope.
Rouky, I understand some of your fears. I remember being scared being on my own for the rest of my life. Not that I was scared begin without H in the house for some time (he traveled a lot, so did I), but for my life being incomplete and sad without H. And it was for a while. I had 4 year BD anniversary a couple of weeks ago, so I’ve been here for a long time. Only now I’m starting to really live my life like H is not coming back. It takes more time for some people to recover from the rejection, betrayal and loss of a spouse. I’m sure this moment will come for you, maybe not as fast as you would like it to.
I know the limbo feeling very well. I’m kind of in a similar situation, as my H has not filed and doesn’t look like he intends to. I’ve come a long way, I’m independent and don’t need H for anything in my life (not saying that I would not love him to do the house work, LOL), but I’m still holding onto that rope… And sometimes I don’t even know why. I’m also questioning and analyzing a lot about why H is not filing, but doing just the opposite now – trying to maintain some joint accounts, which he was ready to drop 4 years ago.
So, I would say, there is always hope. But, the life should not stop for you. I agree with job, keep discovering what is good for you, what you enjoy, take care of yourself.
M:50 H:52 S28 (my S from previous marriage) M:17 + 3 BD: 06/12 S: 06/12 - H works in another state
