Thanks for your insight jelly. great points that I never really thought about...
The way our spouses withdrew, stonewalled, villified, blamed and guilted us, and left is really psychologically damaging! And it's crazy the amount of control we gave them both before and after they left. It was so unhealthy. It's really traumatizing when the person that once loved you and with whom you created life together was capable of betraying and abandoning. I think putting all the blame on me was the worst part though. And your right. I still have that message ingrained..."I better not question, or nag. Just accept". But I wasn't like that before. I forget that I actually have something to offer someone.
I haven't started dating, so am not sure how things will play out. For me, I tend to have strong boundaries in beginning that I'm not afraid to implement. I suspect it's once committed I don't know how to walk away.
What were yours and others boundaries when dating and building friendships?
