Waw, she is in love, need advice/support II

[SH_]

As time goes by I go through this up and down phases, sometimes I am sad, maybe even depressed, sometimes I am full of optimism toward future.

More and more I think it will be better for both of us when we separate, child will adapt. Am I going the wrong way or is it normal to lose sight of saving marriage?

The emotional roller coaster is normal. What efforts you put forth to slow it down and or get off are up to you.
Some choose to try and ride it out. It can be a long ride.

Some choose to emotionally detach via stronger feelings of anger, spite, despair, bitterness, etc. The scars for this approach are deep and somethimes the emotional wounds do not heal and lead to damaging behaviors down the road.

Some choose to heal appropriately through actions that encourage personal growth and betterment. This can be done by seeing professional counsellors, doctors, support groups, as well as seeking out different approaches and information like meditation and spiritual learning.

What approach are you taking?

Your question about separating, and hoping the child will adapt and just giving up on the MR, I don't think all should go together.

Separation at this point may do you and her some good. It is not a bad thing if you are fully aware of what it entails. There are many MR that were saved due to a separation. And the ones that did not, if the appropriate steps are taken, then you at least can be in a good place for your future.

I ask that you do not take the passive approach to your child simply adapting. They are in a developmental state for emotions and the appropriate guidance and professional assistance can help tremendously. Please take an active approach and be the best father possible to assist the child in adapting.

Is it normal to lose sight of saving the marriages?
My question here, is do you believe and stand for marriage?
If you do, then don't lose sight of saving the marriage. But understand your sight can only focus on you and your part of this or any other marriage in your future. Don't lose sight of that.
All MR require 2 people to work in order for it to thrive. So your current marriage may not survive, but do yourself a favor and be sure you can tell your future self that if it does not survive, that you at least did everything possible to be the person only a fool would leave. Then you will be prepared for any future relationships that may be in store for you.

I hope for the best for you, and pray that you can find a more smooth ride on that coaster ride.