Hi Cop, I don't know if I could answer that. I'm also aware that although 4 months feels like a long time out of the house, in reality to the timeframe is is quite short. Honestly, I think my W is also having a bit of an identity crisis and is searching for something. I'm not sure she truely knows herself what she is looking for. I have learnt a lot about her as well as myself and I found the book 5 love languages very insightful in this.
I will start experimenting with some things now that I feel stronger in myself and more like my old self. But I needed to work on me first, I feel you need to do the same. Work on yourself first, find your inner strength first then you will be in a better position to deal with the future.
My W was very angry at the beginning as well so pulling away was also to leave her to deal with that herself rather than playing ball. I read a post from Greek (Greek was Coach's W and she left, filed for divorce but they reconciled after Coach was on this board) Think about Tennis, we can bash the ball back n forth in these arguments, what if you decide to not play anymore and just let the ball bounce past. This is something I have been working on majorly because arguments was one of our problems.
