I echo what everyone has said, especially what Cadet said. This is a numbers game. usually people settle to because they are advised to, feel bad, or don't have the energy. I know court is expensive within itself, but if they are king for an amount that makes it unsustainable for you to live, you need to bring this before a judge. The numbers need to add p for the both of you. There needs to be put a time limit and a circumstance in which she becomes employable.
I understand how frustrating that fine line must be where it is unfair, to where it just isn't doable.
I also want to thank you for your response on Cnut's thread. I didn't want to reply there as to not totally hijak it. What you said makes complete sense. I appreciate your compliment where you say if someone can put the kids first, it's me. However, you would e shocked to know I never neglected the M. We parented together for 6 months (he was cheating the whole time, I had no clue). We went to a Halloween party together when our D was a few weeks old (got a babysitter), I got my aunt to watch our D for Valentines day (when he was talking to OW the whole way home in a separate car) We had a few date nights, and I even arranged for us to get two nights away when she was 6 months old. He left me 2 days later.
As a single mom dater, I will go out of my way find a babysitter, I was the one who drove 3 hours every weekend to see my ex boyfriend. I was the one who rearranged my parenting schedule to see my ex boyfriend or any ther guy I dated. They never did the me for me.
So I do believe in putting an R first. And actually, as a single mom, I believe in putting myself first sometimes. So when I say my daughter is my priority, her well being always will be. Anything that does not benefit her well being just isn't go to work. ANd the right guy wouldn't compromise the well being my daughter.
Welcome to surviving the big D. We all surivived. We rebuilt, or are rebuilding, and just navigating r lives over here.
