Have i been making mistakes too long part 8

[tkdmme]

I am doing ok SH.

I have been out of town for a while and have enjoyed the break. I was able to spend some time with my parents. My father starts chemo again this coming Thursday. he is not doing well. The cancer has spread to his liver, prostate and lymph nodes. He will probably not be with us very long. I have been thinking about moving back to be closer to them but im not sure it would work because of the kids. I would be 4 hours away. Ill figure something out I guess.

As for the STBX, im more confused than ever. At the end of last week I had decided to file for D. I have an appointment tomorrow with a lawyer and I was totally ready to pull the trigger and get things moving. On Friday last week I spoke with W and asked her if she was sure that she wanted this. I told her that I didn't and that I wanted to work things out. She said she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. I asked for a sit down conversation and she agreed. I talked to her on Sunday and asked when she would like to talk and she said that she would when she could. I asked, do you mean when you have time? She said no, when she can. What does this mean? I don't understand "when I can". She is still blaming me for everything but she seems confused.

Anyway,
Yesterday was the fourth and I figured I would be spending the day alone. She called and asked if I wanted to take the kids to get fireworks. Of course I jumped at the opportunity. She also invited me to her brother's for a cook out and to do the fireworks I had bought for the kids. Again I was totally up for it.

During the cookout she completely ignored me and seemed agitated that I was there. She invited me! What the hell is going on here? We ate and shot off the fireworks. I then went home feeling more confused than ever.