Drop the Rope VII

[roist]

I have stayed away from fb blog in case W sees that on my page. She has not access to my account but is a friend on fb, plus we are often side by side when we go on fb.

Anyway enough about me, how are you?

[Zephyr]

has been a bit since I posted. I have been busy beyond belief.

I am keeping myself occupied with Roller Derby practice and gym visits, as well as taking the kids to the pool.

This weekend I took my S14 to a laser tag style venue...it is at a haunted house and they had live action actors dressed as zombies, with the laser tag sensors around their head. We both had a blast with that. definitely fun.

Saturday we took the boys to the pool during the day, then went with a large group to see Huey Lewis and Jimmy Buffet Concert. Had a great time, with the neighborhood folks.

Sunday we had to run a bunch of errands and went to buy S14 (as part of his birthday / graduation present) a bass guitar and all the accessories. we sat down and he had a huge smile working on that (also got him to clean some of his room to make space, so win/win ). After dinner we all went to go swimming at the pool, we all had fun...kids even got wife to go off the diving board.

So overall weekend was absolutely awesome. lots of togetherness with kids as family. lots of togetherness with wife and me separate and in adult group. we lay in bed together for almost 3 hours sunday morning after I got the coffee (yes a bit too much to drink Saturday night) but lots of just talking, hand holding, cuddling, etc.

This morning...had a little oddity, I was getting ready for work. I looked in the mirror and maybe for the first time in my life I saw an older person. I don't know why. I felt like I was not a young man anymore. left the bathroom and wife saw my face...and actually sought to comfort me a bit, not just with words. So that felt nice.

This week looks like a good chance to have some fun. we are going to go to Michigan for the weekend (looks to be potentially awesome weather), I have a couple of derby practices, at least 2 trips to breweries planned, I have no idea what else ... leaving that up in the air, will see

Thanks for letting me blab.

[roist]

How is the guy in the mirror today? Love him regardless of his age! Maybe you were just tired. I too am starting to see my dad in the mirror.I guess the clock moves forward regardless.In the meantime you seem to be enjoying life as fully as possible.

Can I be curious and ask you how is your sex life? How is intimacy in general?:

I think you are the king of GAL here. Throughout the last year you have always been an inspiration on how to GAL.You have s life.SS life that is enviable. I am happy for you and glad you have filled your life with do many fun moments and activities.

Best wishes.

[Zephyr]

intimacy is still the issue.

days like Sunday where we share togetherness, a tiny bit of openness and touching are the exception to the rule.

there are days where her head never leaves her phone or computer for me or the kids. trust has not returned fully yet either.

I do sometimes get random hugs or compliments, got nice fathers day present (we'LL see how birthday goes this weekend),

we spend a ton of qt together. both as a family and a couple. that is where my memories of good times are formed. I will not die on my couch every night of my life. we had a couple of really bad months here with wife breaking her arm and clavicle where we could not do muc, but she is on the mend for sure.

sex has dwindled again. we haven't had any in couple months, 1 in the last 5, 2 in 7. living as if the last time we have sex is the last time I could have ever had it...just not a good way to live. (yes, intercorse/heavy intimate encounters are indicated in my journal for recollection).

thanks for helping me fight through this. just typing helps me see that i do not to all that much to complain about

[roist]

Your complaints are real and valid. It is an important part that is not fully in place. I know you are being careful to avoid triggers in W, but have you tried to get her on board with regards to your needs. Maybe a conversation is feasible or simply initiating. You know best but maybe it is time to take the bull by the horns.

you have a lot of positives.IIt is great you realize that and you focus on what you have as opposed to what you haven't. So many people miss that crucial point and spend their lives chasing what is missing and missing out on what is there.

I wish you all the best

Happy birthday

[roist]

Thanks for replying by the way. You avoid talking about that side of things so I wondered where ye were really at. Thanks for being honest and open. I am reflecting on some aspects of your situation and will get back to you with some thoughts if I clear them up.

Until then, Just a quick flyby to wish you a great birthday weekend. I'll raise a glass to you.

Best wishes

[Zephyr]

no pressure roiste...I have time

I want tone thank you and tell you how truly grateful I am that I found you in this wide world. there are a number of you, i call them friends, who I would not be i would not be in as good a place without you.

so when you raise your glass for me...I will be saying that you.

I am heading to bells brewery on Sunday. they have a new brewe that I have been dying to try (a double two hearted ale) OMG I can't wait

[roist]

How was that ale and how was your birthday? it must be cool to have it the same weekend as 4th of July

Best wishes.

[Zephyr]

weekend was nice. beautiful weather. had my family, folks and friends to spend weekend with. in laws were all there.

the ale was awesome...but whoa was it potent, 11.3% for a beer is strong. worth the wait.

the holiday / birthday is great. I never have to work the next day after birthday;)

only downside is my twin brother always goes to his in laws for the 4th so I've only seen him once in last 12 years on our birthday. we always talk, but not the same.

otherwise birthday was nice. kids made a nice card. my nephews / nice did too. very sweet. wife apologized for not having a present. she said she ordered something that needed to be signed for, so wouldn't get it till we get back. it means a lot that she did something for my birthday, it had been a long while since age did.

thanks for checking in on me! will be a busy week here, with shortened work week.

[roist]

I'm heading off for a long weekend after work today, so I just wanted to? Express that I hope all is well in your part of the world.I hope your present arrived!

Would your brother like to share his birthday with you? Why don't you broach the possibility with him to celebrate it together next year? If for whatever reason it is not possible for him to change his tradition of spending that weekend with the in laws, ye could do it together the weekend before/after.

There is always a solution if people want to. I am nit trying to solve your problems, just curious about it.

Best wishes.