The start of something... new (again)

[betterm]

Do you all think it's common for WAW-in-the-making can lead to Waywardness in the process?

anecdotally i would be in agreement with you betterm

Thanks for your input, Natus. I don't think it really matters much at this point, as I've taken steps to be the best me regardless of what she's doing/thinking/etc. But still just something I was thinking about. I think her depression, feelings of not be valued, desired, etc, lead to a WAW mentality, which could've been lingering for months, then when OM was found it became something different.

BTW, I did find out recently that OM is ALSO going through a divorce himself... W told me this of all people when he came up in conversation about "our future." I calmly asked if she still talks to him, and she said "he is a friend and he is helping me get through some "lawyer" things... he is also going through a divorce i think so its nothing more than friendly help"... HAHA, MmmmHmmmmm! I told her I was glad she had someone that is familiar with the process to help her out.

I think the driving force behind a WW is probably comprised of a number of forces. There's family background, preexisting psychological issues, current psychological issues (depression, self esteem), abuse issues, midlife crisis, hormonal changes, and a number of other things that contribute to the WW behavior.

I know that Cadet has studied the underlying causes of WAW/WW and can probably provide invaluable input.

All I know is, if you have a fever, the prescription is more cowbell. If you have a WS, the prescription is boxes and tape.

It's interesting... I've thought about this before and sometimes I just forget "root cause." I come to remember that ball-busting D coach I hired near the beginning, the session with me IC, and my DB-coach, where we talked my W's historical patterns and cultural childhood development that has probably lead my W to "medicate with the easiest route she can find at that time." To "throw away was she really cares for in her life, for something that seems important at that specific time." It's a real problem, and I know this, sometimes slips my mind. And yes, Cadet's detailed posts on WAW/WW I have found to be very informative.

My W was not sexually abused in childhood, but grew up under a wings of an un-medicated manic/bi-polar mother (among other mental issues), so the impulsive swings and "what do i need right now and where can I find it" mentality was deeply engraved in early years. Also, to mention the doormat dad (bless his heart, great man, but now I see how he enabled this behavior), who just allowed it all to happen to avoid the storms...