You need to give yourself a little slack. This is some of the hardest work we will ever do. It's hard because it's about changing fundamental things within, switching to healthier, less co-dependent coping skills and rebuilding ourselves. This comes with growing pains, we will feel moments of hopelessness and grief but with time they lessen in frequency and severity.
Your journey is one of the self, we need to be careful not to look towards our spouses to be our guide. In our particular cases our WH's are not even in the baby steps yet and we are expecting them to be walking beside us, it's simply not within their ability yet. I recommend you keep a goal/accomplishment journal. This puts your goals in concrete terms which lets you anchor when you start to drift. You have come so far so quickly, don't use your spouse as a temp checker, he's not able to be your support.
M 10yrs T 13yrs BD #1Oct 2015-PA between WAH and COW BD #2 April 2016-WH resumed PA, she broke it off Jan 2 2017 WH says he wants divorce April '17-Letting go 2018 D busted DD8, DS6, DS3
