I think deep down I knew I couldn't believe her text today, but I think maybe it's one step closer to her realizing that she's made a huge mistake.
Not that I stopped, but back to goals, GAL, and thinking about boundaries and consequences.
lfm,
You're one of those nice "welcome home" doormats and your wife is walking all over you. The problem isn't the current OM, it's all of the future OMs. The time for thinking about boundaries and consequences is long gone; you have to take action or you can decide to be happy listening to your wife's renditions of her various trysts.
I am sorry to hear what happened. Actions speak louder than words. Agree with doodler, do not be the doormat. Think of the boundaries and communicate them to your W. It is your choice on whether you want to continue to live like this or gain your life back and be happy.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
doodle, i think I understand what you are trying to say. I will disagree with a part of it and say emphatically that it is never too late for boundaries.
we are setting them up for us. we make those to protect ourselves from further harm. the consequences, well that is if someone violates our tenants of behaviour we will not tolerate in out life.
we are.not setting boundaries to control someone else's behavior, because after all they are grown ups and may chose to do as they see fit.
so, this is absolutely where we need to start.
if (as I believe you are trying to say) no more being a doormat. I agree
soo lfm, today is your new day. treat yourself kindly!
Last edited by Cadet; 07/01/1605:32 AM. Reason: Start a new thread message
doodle, i think I understand what you are trying to say. I will disagree with a part of it and say emphatically that it is never too late for boundaries.
Zephyr,
I agree with your disagreement. It was poor communication on my part. He does need to think about boundaries and consequences. I was trying to convey that it's time for action not just thinking.
A couple of weeks ago I would've said, "Get some boxes and tape." I was trying to be nicer and more diplomatic and it bit in the ass.
